Negotiation principle 2: Interests behind positions
The fear of not getting what we want quickly causes us to make demands. If they don’t get through straight away, we put our foot down. Pressure is transmitted at lightning speed between the conversation partners. The result: insistence, tug-of-war, haggling, hasty compromise or even worse: abandonment!
The recommendation here is: Look for interests behind positions!
Position: explicit requirement
Interest: hidden reasons, motives, hopes, fears behind the claim
Therefore:
- Know not only what you want, but also why you want it. Say it.
- Take an interest in what might be important to the other person. Ask for.
How can you find out the interests of your negotiating partner?
- Put yourself in the other person’s shoes!
- Pay careful attention to every position/point of view in the interlocutor’s statement.
- Question the positions according to the underlying interests. Ask the person you are talking to directly why they hold this point of view!
- Paraphrase the other person’s presumed interests in an appreciative manner.
- Draw up a list of the various interests of all participants during the preparation phase.
- State your interests as clearly as possible, but don’t expect the others to make their interests known without further ado (they may not be entirely clear themselves). Ask about it, and be patient if they need to think about it.
- Suggest options that fulfill your interests. Then ask what the other person likes or dislikes about it.
